Middle of nowhere with everyone that matters 

by Jinryu

It’s 6am somewhere and I’ve just woken up. I have no idea when I will get over the jet lag, but given that we are ona cruise, it doesn’t seem to matter all that much anymore since we are working on whatever schedule we please. It’s nice like that.

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Being on a cruise is a bit of a social connections detox. Part of it is because of the fact that you are on a boat and don’t know anybody except who you come with. CM and I aren’t the type who actively seek to meet new people in these sorts of situations– part of our reasons for being in this type of holiday is to not have to deal with people we know.

The second reason is that there is no internet. Well, there is, but it is only by satellite uplink, and at 75 American cents per minute, it gets real steep real fast. 

So there’s no email and no Facebook and no alerts to constantly demand your attention. That actually counts for a lot.
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Our Montreal wedding was less than a week ago, and our Sydney wedding was less than two weeks ago. It’s only now that we are realising what the whole honeymoon process is for: it is to recover from the wedding. 

CM had more involvement in the planning of the Sydney wedding than I did. It is one of those situations where I know that she has more aesthetic sense than I do, so I necessarily left most of the choices up to her. It’s mostly near the end where i was involved in some of the legwork, like driving things back and forth to the villa where most her her visiting family were staying. I honestly can’t say that I had relatively nearly as many responsibilities as my wife did in setting it all up… And I still felt like it was a lot of work.
For those of you who are not yet married,all I can say is if you can afford it, get a wedding planner. CM mostly planned the Sydney wedding from scratch, and I mostly took care of the Montreal wedding, but they were both mentally very draining. By the time we were at the weddings, we were exhausted and any little thing was making CM upset.

Weddings are a mixed bag– there is so much social expectation to do things a certain way that we really felt string pressure to get things right and to impress in ways that we wouldn’t normally care about. This makes a lot of people upset. It makes a lot of people bitter and angry.
On the other hand, the celebration is something else. It’s a gathering of the people who you honestly like to spend time with but can’t normally coordinate with enough to actually make it happen. You get to catch up and people will tell you, with sincerity, all the nicest things. 

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