Give ‘Em Hell
This one is dedicated to [CM].
The song is “The Fighter” by Gym Class Heroes. It’s not a new song, but it’s one I keep coming back to whenever I find it in my play list.
I hurt my knee a couple of days ago. While doing a grounwork demonstration at the university’s orientation day, which is when clubs show off and hope to attract the next year’s worth of members, my partner did something strange and it hurt my lateral colateral ligament (LCL), also known as the fibular collateral ligament. The morning after, which is to say, this morning, there was noticible swelling and it was quite painful to walk. I’ve had my knee up for most of the day, doing work on my laptop with my back on the carpet while my legs hang up on the couch.
I’m a bit pissed off because the guy who hurt me should not have. On one hand, I guess I could have been more warmed up. On the other hand, he should have understood when I said “lets roll lightly to warm up” that that meant that he shouldn’t be doing any violent, sudden movements.
He’s the kind of person who is super nice in person, to the point of it being a fault and sometimes frankly a bit annoying because it comes off as being too eager to please. But when he fights, he is either super timid and non-agressive or full on ferral. Ferral in the sense that he forgets all technique and suddenly just tries to brute force everything. I’m not sure why he decided to suddenly go hulk mode on me, and as I said it wouldn’t normally be a problem if I was fully warmed up, but…well whatever. This is part of risk of this type of activity.
I think everybody feels the same way, but I hate being injured. Like whenever I’m substantially sick, the reminder of my mortality is never something that is welcome.
But at the same time, I’ve come to appreciate the downtime that comes after it. I think I have a greater appreciation for the smaller things in life just because the inevitable mental and physical downtime afterwards forces some introspection about what’s important to me, and what exactly in my life are the things worth suffering for.
I’m never going to say that I enjoy being injured– more like I’ve come to find some way to mentally channel my frustration into more positive thoughts whenever it happens.
Being injured always tests my resolve. Nowadays more than when I was younger, every substantial injury makes me wonder if I should quit.
In a strange way, every time I decide not to quit is probably what makes keeping it up even more important?
Getting injured throughout the course of martial arts training is analogous to all other aspects of life as well.
News from the front lines:
- My thesis topic was approved by a professor who has agreed to supervise my project. She signed/endorsed my application today, and it went into the school’s mailbox.
- I was accepted for College of Law, which offers the “Practical Legal Training” requirement– basically, it’s a course that leads to licensing as a New South Wales solicitor.
- Working on more job applications– on to the “essay questions” components.
- Managed to do some real cooking, having both a real lunch and a real dinner. I made the time specifically because I feel that there’s only so much motivation I get out of protein shakes and meal replacement drinks, or random “bachelor meals” of rice/noodles with frozen/canned this or that.
- Have rehabilitated my knee from this morning being unable to walk without a cane due to inflamation to being able to walk with relative confidence, and without the knee buckling. It’s not going to be judo-able for a few more days still, but all the icing and elevation and compression, coupled with the ibuprofen, has really sped things up. I’m not normally this disciplined with injuries, but I take special care when it comes to knee problems.
Nothing on this list is in itself a major win– but winning isn’t everything. It’s more of a byproduct.
Who I am is a fighter who fights the fights that need fighting.