by Jinryu

It’s never enough to just say “Life ain’t easy.” That’s just annoyingly obvious at times, and it’s about as useful as the rebuttal which is like telling someone “you’ll understand when you’re older.”  What do I think is the most important thing that people need to learn? To lean.

On one hand, when your legs are heavy, it means having someone around you who can psychologically or physically crutch you through the ordeal.  When you’re hurt, you’ve got to consider– do you need help? Asking for help is one of the hardest things you can ever do, so I don’t say this lightly!  I know I hate asking for help.  And I know that to compound the problem, I’m stubborn, have illusions of grandeur, and am pretty competitive.  Relying on others however serves a twofold importance for me– firstly to help me get through the logistics of the ordeal, by either offering fresh perspective or muscle; and secondly, and more importantly, by giving me the sense that people are there for me.  As far as the external benefits of leaning– it also has the nice effect of making those you rely on feel needed, and trusted.

You don’t need to lean when you’re in trouble.  Take a completely different situation: if you’re just standing there, feeling quite passively like a purposeless idiot (as I often do), you need to lean– not on someone, but in any direction.  What happens? If you don’t put your feet under you, if you don’t move your foundations to support your head (which is in the clouds and has scant idea of what is next) then you will fall over.  Leaning isn’t the first step, it is what leads to the first step.

The first step of what?  It doesn’t always matter.

In my head, then:

  • to lean kinda somewhere between the nouns courage and curiosity, but it’s an action
  • leaning is not usually as dramatic as the verb to brave, (since bravery isn’t a daily thing, and if it is, then man, that must be a stressful life) but every bit as important because leaning is a daily occurance.
  • to lean is to decide to shift because the current situation will not do.

It doesn’t mean you need to know where you’re going, and it doesn’t mean that leaning is guaranteed to get you anywhere.  When we see seek the cousel of others or we decide to change the scenery, its because there is nothing more for us in our current state– then the answers lie elsewhere.