…like you do when you think nobody’s listening

by Jinryu

This episode of Scrubs was always one of my favorites.   I think that, when my first experience with patient death occured when I was working at the Montreal Chest, this was one of the episodes that I watched over a few times to cheer myself up with song.

Yesterday, at 8:30pm, I was at Tokebi.

I don’t know what it is about that place.  It’s not the alcohol in itself, but it is something about the consistency of it all.  You know how they tell you, don’t do work in bed, because you want your bed to be associated only with sleep and intimacy?  Well, in the same way, I think I’ve come to associate Tokebi on some level with just relaxing and having a fun time.  Even when it’s not spectacular, it’s always good.  Maybe it’s the company.

We had a bit to drink and, at about 12:15AM, I left the place to go to work.  Yes, after drinking, I went to start my 8 hour shift at Emergency.

I stay within my limits of course but you know what, drinking puts me in a really good mood.  I don’t know what it is.  I just feel more talkative, I can ignore more shit from people much more easily, I don’t know what it is.  Upon coming in, I discovered that the doctor on guard that night was the single slowest doctor in our department.  Everyone hates working with that doctor because she’s so slow that wait times spiral out of control, and that means tons of angry parents.

But no matter how bad it was, I was so chill that night that it surprised even me.  I was smiling, having conversations with parents, joking around– basically disarming anyone who came up to me with a doubt about our services.

Doubt.  You know what, that’s what I think it is.

Or rather, confidence.  I don’t think I did anything different today except that all that beer, which cost me about a day’s salary, just made me feel like I could do anything.  Not in a crazy ‘jump on the tables’ sorta way, but, within my own job functions, I could do everything with that much more oomph.

At some point, I managed to get a couple of the nurses to come with me into the waiting room where we sang Bohemian Rhapsody with the help of a bunch of parents, with my cellphone playing the original song on speakermode to keep us all in tune.

I think the crowd really enjoyed that.  It was so weird and spontaneous that even if you didn’t know the song (as some people didn’t) you couldn’t help but think that something amazing was going on at this hospital. 

That wasn’t exactly on my list of things to do before I die, but now that I’ve done it….

It’s 9:38AM and it’s time for me to go to sleep now folks.  My day just ended, but yours is just beginning!