This time of year, every year, when midterms hit the fan like the
rudest, most foul piece of shit you’ve ever laid eyes, nose or tongue
on, it’s the same story for every student across America. “I
shouldn’t have left this to the last minute”. Take your choice;
you’re either the preson who did jack for the first half of the
semester, and thus is forced up to the wall for the Mexican standoff
that you didn’t ask for, or, you’re the overachiever that’s going to
get an A- but really, really wants that A++.
Scenarious pio significanco, the temptation is the same—you think to yourself, if only I hadn’t put this off to the last minute.
There is this infernal machine in this mall in Onatrio, I think it’s
called Square One or Erin Mills, somewhere near Missasauga. It’s
one of those machines where you have some poor, hapless ball who’se
been pumped into the bowels of a twisted orgy of metal rails,
slingshots, bells and whilstles. It starts at the top, and
graudually makes it’s way down, only to be shoved back to the
top. That little ball, about 1 inch in diameter, is the
figurative representation of my attention span. The goal is to
get to ground level. But because life is the way it is, and we
really don’t like doing anything sensible like giving gravity the
pleasure of having it’s way with us without a fight, we de do
everything in our power to divert our attention from the inevitable.
I use this analogy because I’m afraid of heights, so the sooner I can get to ground level, the better.
But really—the thing about life is that there is no real set goal
beyond what we make for ourselves. So if we throw machinations in
our own way—say, a turn here, a loop there, maybe even a jump backwards
here and there—is it really that we’ve lost focus? I mean, the
contant mantra that pins like a shadow is that we’re supposed to stay
focused on what we want. But, if we procrastinate, it is perhaps
not that we are lazy to finally work on what we want, but perhaps that
we simply don’t want it, whatever it may be, as bad as we thought we
Or perhaps procrastination is an effort to have your cake and eat it
to, and since we can probably just as easily start something tomorrow
as we can today, why not manage our schedules to breakneck efficiency?
Efficicency my ass. Don’t procrastinate, don’t assume you can overmanage, or you’ll shit tetris pieces.
Course I can say this, but in my 23 years on this planet I have yet to
take my own advice. I guess I’ll get around to it at some point.